The Beginning

Thursday, October 27, 2011

All or nothing

I must say that I had fallen by the way side. A lot has happened since my last post, as I am sure I will explain in more posts to come. The last few weeks, I have been wanting to start writing on my blog again. The reason I haven't is because I have felt like a failure. I didn't want to post about something I'm going to do, and then not do it. So this morning I was sitting in the suana at the gym (sweating out the fat) when it dawns on me that I have a 'ALL OR NOTHING' attitude... and I had better lose it quick.

In fact this morning I had wanted to get to the gym to start a new class.... however I overslept and was late about 10 minutes and I'm not about to join a class late as a new member.... Normally I would have rolled back over to sleep and thought 'next time'... I got up and went to the gym and worked out on some of the machines. So many times I will plan to do something and put forth all the effort to get ready for it... and then when it arrives I end up not doing it... and just dissappointing myself.

I was trying to figure out where I got this 'ALL OR NOTHING' attitude from and I think it comes from trying to be a perfectionist. I can also see where this is hurting me in my eating habits... typically (like a lot of other people apparently) when I eat something that I know I shouldn't it leads me down a path of a lot of bad decisions. By the time I am done I have made a 1000, 2000, 3000 calorie mistake.... and if I would've just accepted the fact that I did have something in the beginning and moved on.... then it would have only been a 200 or 300 calorie mistake. How is it that I allow myself to sabatoge myself?

Anyways, I'm back... I've been on track for the last 3 weeks. I've been getting my butt up at 4:30.... errr my husband has been getting my butt up at 4:30 in the morning to go to the gym and work out. I'm really feeling the changes. I'm really feeling great (except at 4:30 in the morning... then more sleep would be great).

Much much more to come
Love Always,